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Community Corner

Only Millionaires Allowed? Campaign Financing Needs to Change

Will Trade: Danced on, spaghetti stained wedding dress for poster board and Sharpie.

I will never donate money to an election campaign or politicians. Unless I am buying an item with the “donation” such as my Obama coffee cup or a particularly humorous bumper sticker, I cannot bring myself to give a portion of my limited means to anyone running for any office. Call me cheap, call me un-American – heck, I have been called worse. But first, let me explain the grip on my wallet. 

Campaigns suck. 

Thank you and have a good day.

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Let me elaborate. Do you know how much moolah was spent in the last Wisconsin governor's race? Over $37 million. Perhaps that doesn't sound like a lot to some folks, but to me it looks like this: 560,606 Danish Layer Cakes; 1,224 Grand Jeep Cherokees; 278 homes (median WI value); over 1/3 of what Walker claims to be Wisconsin's debt; 308,333 goats from Heifer International.  Kinda a lot, eh?

And this is just a measly Wisconsin Governor's race. In the 2008 presidential election, the tally came to a whopping $5.3 billion. Now THAT'S a lot of goats.

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Close your eyes. Think about all the good that can come from $5.3 billion. Think about feeding the hungry, restoring our parks, updating our schools, providing healthcare to all, establishing programs for veterans. Wouldn't that be so nice?

Instead, all that money actually paid for plane fuel, campaign staffer salaries, mud slinging television spots, yard signs, and endless "vote for me" propaganda. 

It sort of reminds me of my wedding (sorry, dear). I mean, we planned a fairly modest wedding compared to many. We had a $10,000 budget and that included the honeymoon. When I contemplate the hundreds I spent on my dress, liquor, food, favors, and where is all that stuff now? Either in the trash heap in Mount Pleasant or in a Rubbermaid storage container collecting dust in my basement.

Winning a political office takes money, true, but it doesn't have to be. Get rid of the ads. Television, radio, cardboard fliers – 86 them all. Not only will it save billions but it will also save us the constant annoyance during an election season. 

Stop all the aging and costly traveling. Poor Obama aged 12 years in the months prior to his presidency. Travel is so drying on the pores. And honestly, we already know what you sound like, look like and we really don't NEED to shake your hand to choose the best candidate. 

Corporate, lobby and union donations should all be gone. Any special interest group or organization should be disallowed to finance one iota of a candidate's campaign. Why this isn't a given, I have no clue. Even the most well intended politician can succumb to a nagging obligation – don't allow that opportunity to exist.  

Have a number of public debates moderated by non-partisan persons with questions submitted by citizens. These debates, as well as individual interviews, should be easily accessible and unedited via television, internet, radio and print. 

That's it. That's all we need. Everything else makes the process more complicated, emotional, redundant and wasteful. And an interested, qualified citizen should not have to be swimming in the ocean of mucho dinero to run for political office. 

So no, I will not financially contribute to election campaigns regardless of my allegiance to a candidate. If they want to do it my way, I will be happy to sell my “distressed” tulle wedding dress to pay for the supplies for making my own yard signs.

When I think about my wedding, I think fondly that yeah, I looked pretty for a day, we all ate well, got pretty tipsy and had a great time. But I think about how I would spend that money today and I feel the desire to find a time machine, travel back into my 20s and smack myself upside the head

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